As Queen, Elizabeth II’s family life was anything but traditional – she was often away from home, busy with work and at times had complicated relationships with her four children.

She was 22 and still a princess when her eldest son and heir apparent, Charles, was born, and 24 when Princess Anne showed up.

But she sometimes left them for months to join or travel abroad with her husband Prince Philip, a naval officer stationed in Malta.

The young children stayed at home with their nannies and governesses, just as she had done as a child in the late 1920s and 1930s.

Charles’ nanny is “very authoritative,” said the new king’s biographer, royal author Penny Junor.

“Elizabeth was a young new mom and this very experienced nanny took over… she waited half an hour at tea time or whatever for the nanny to bring Charles to her,” she told AFP.

“I’m sure she loved her family. But I don’t think she was demonstrative in her affection.”

Old family photos and videos show Elizabeth smiling, posing with Charles in his stroller or, as a family, waving a rattle at Prince Andrew, who was born when Charles was 11 years old.

But there’s little that seems to hide what appears to be a stiff formality.

When five-year-old Charles saw his parents for the first time in months after they returned from a month-long tour of the Commonwealth, she held out her hand.

In a later authorized biography, Charles said his mother was “not indifferent but distant”.

“If he was a horse or a dog, they would have been a lot closer,” Junor added of Charles, who was described as a sensitive and awkward child.

In contrast, Elizabeth, who is known for her love of horses and corgis, was closer to her daughter Anne, who developed into a skilled rider and allowed the couple to share their passion.

Even strict royal protocol did little to encourage closer bonds: the Queen’s children and grandchildren were required to bow or curtsey to her even behind closed doors.

Complicating matters further, Charles’ lifelong role as heir made his future entirely dependent on his mother’s death.

“Charles always adored his mother and put her on a little pedestal. It’s not a mother-son relationship. It’s more of a monarch subject,” Junor said.

The Queen had a more relaxed relationship with Andrew and Edward, who were born at 33 and 37 respectively.

All four children were sent to boarding school at an early age.

Family life provided the biggest shocks during her record-breaking reign.

In 1992, Anne divorced her husband Mark Phillips, Charles from Diana and Andrew from Sarah Ferguson.

Exacerbated by a major fire at her favorite home at Windsor Castle west of London, the Queen called the 12 months her “annus horribilis”.

After Diana’s death in 1997, the Queen initially dismissed the idea of ??Charles marrying his longtime lover, Camilla Parker Bowles.

She did not attend her civil wedding in Windsor in 2005, but organized a reception at the castle.

When asked about Charles’ criticism of her mother, Anne said: “I don’t give any of us a second thought that she didn’t take care of us like any other mother.

“I just think it’s extraordinary that anyone could think that couldn’t be true,” she told the BBC.

Separations and divorces were not the end of family strife.

In 2019, Andrew – reportedly her favorite – was forced to step down from frontline royal duties because of his friendship with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.

The following year, grandson Harry and his wife Meghan left royal life and moved to the United States, from where they criticized the family and accused some members of racism.

Elizabeth only met the couple’s daughter, Lilibet, once. She was born in June 2021 and named after her childhood nickname.

As a grandmother of eight and with 12 great-grandchildren, the Queen loved family dinners and hosted annual Christmas parties at her Sandringham estate.

Even as she slowed down after a health issue in October 2021, she attended the christenings of two of her great-grandchildren in Windsor.

Grandson William, to whom she had been close after Diana’s death, paid her a glowing tribute in a recent biography.

“The Queen’s kindness and sense of humor, her innate sense of calm and perspective, and her love of family and home are all attributes I experience firsthand,” he wrote.

“I am privileged to have the Queen as a role model for a life of public service.”